please to be giving us your name


Let's translate some of this corporate smarm-speak:

We think it's cute that in the old days of the Web people used funny fake names but in the modern world, that's not advancing our business model. The name you chose isn't really hard to read, that's just some crap we're saying. Here's the bottom line: if you're going to continue playing here for free, posting cute animal antics and such, we need a name -- your name -- to give to our advertisers and miscellaneous government agencies so they can start building dossiers on you. If you can't handle that, post your own fuzzy animals and see how many people find them.